Epilogue

As the plane rumbled down the runway and the wheels lifted off from China, I couldn’t help wondering if and when we would be back. Things have changed so much in 13 years, what would the next 13 years bring?  What would the world be like when the girls are my age? Thirteen years ago, I was driving north on I270 in St. Louis after visiting the doctor, with Linda next to me in tears.   We had been struggling to get pregnant and no one could tell us why we couldn’t.  We couldn’t help but feel we had done something wrong or were being punished.  In my desperation I said a simple prayer “Lord, I’m lost. Show me the way.”  It wasn’t very elegant, but it was sincere.  That prayer was answered, and Maggie is proof of that as are Becky and Ashley.  I had no idea of the adventure we would embark on and the incredibly special, gracious and loving people we would meet an entire world away on the other side of the globe.

 

This trip could not have been more special for us.  I hope it is an experience the girls will remember and cherish throughout their lives as it was a precious time together as a family, a chance to better understand the world in which we live and the goodness of God and to recognize all the blessing He has bestowed upon us.  China is a beautiful country full of amazing history and majesty, contradiction, human triumph as well as hardship and suffering.  The people we met who care for these orphaned children are true heroes.  What they do is amazing.  All the people we met were truly kind and gracious people.

 

In the brief history of our country, we have been given many lessons of brave men and women who gave their lives in conflict to preserve our way of life and freedom.   Last Spring we took the girls to Washington D.C, the monuments and the museums to better understand this history and sacrifices made to form and preserve our nation.    While I have understood our history of conflict and fighting for our freedoms, I am not sure I every fully comprehended it.  In our short visit to China, I believe I now have a more visceral understanding of what freedom is by getting to more closely know people who do not posses it fully.  I cannot imagine a world in which my children would live and not be able to completely choose what they want to be, where they want to live, where and when they want to travel, openly live their beliefs, pursue causes that move their hearts and chase their dreams.  I get it now…the men and women who fought and died for our freedom did so for their children, because knowing what true freedom means, they could not fathom their sons and daughters inheriting anything less.  And while our country has been criticized at times for fighting under the banner of freedom, and admittedly, certain actions in our nation’s history have been less than noble, our actions are often not understood because freedom cannot be understood unless it is experienced in its full measure.

 

The people of China are just like us.  They love their children; they have hopes and dreams of raising their families and building successful enterprises and happy lives. We are far more alike than we are different.  We are blessed to have true friends in China.  They are loving and kind people who looked after Maggie for the first four months of her life and continue to look after thousands of children who have been orphaned, not so much by an individual’s free will but by their difficult circumstances.

 

They all need our prayers…not just the orphans and their caretakers, but the people of China.  The good people like Lina, Abbey, Melody, and Simon who are pursuing their dreams in a country that is transforming to a world power and struggling with the myriad of social and political issues that go with it. 

 

We will always have a special bond with them and we will always consider them friends.  We will continue to endeavor to share our blessings and wealth to help these orphaned children find health and happiness and we will continue to thank God for his abundant blessings and for allowing us to live in the greatest country on earth.

Friday in Hong Kong

Well, this is our last full day in China. It’s hard to believe. It feels like we have been planning and anticipating this trip for so long; now it is drawing to a close. It has been a phenomenal experience.
Our day started very early as we needed to get to a 9AM train to Hong Kong and make it through the GuangZhou traffic. We packed Thursday night, and got everybody up at 6AM. We enjoyed our last delicious breakfast at the White Swan, schlepped our bags down to the lobby and waited to get on the hotel shuttle to the train station.
We got a mini tour of the city on the way over. We saw the other side of town and what seemed to be the business district …it was quite impressive. We arrived at the train station and had a bit of a walk…we were clearly in a modern part of China…they swapped out the stationary steps for escalators (note: there is no place one may go in China were one does not encounter a significant number of steps. They seem to enjoy a variety, and there seems to be no requirement whatsoever to make them uniform. Ever walk up a set of stairs and think there is one more step and there’s not? I did that a lot.) We were clearly a spectacle with our bags…the five us each pushing our steamer trunks down the street; as if the blond hair wasn’t enough.
We made our way up the escalator to the outer waiting lounge for the Hong Kong train T805. This was the waiting area to go through customs, which would then lead to the waiting lounge to wait for the train. I was relieved to see that we weren’t the only ones with a lot of bags, there were other uber-packers there too. I was concerned about where we were going to go with all these bags. It is amazing to me that there is really no accommodations made for this. All the train has is a modest overhead rack, that should I put one of Linda’s well packed cases on it, it would surely collapse crushing some unsuspecting Chinese national.
The doors opened and we went through to customs. Now, the way we do this is we each go up individually. So I had out the passports with the departure cards in them and gave them to each of the girls and Linda. This time it so happened I went through first. I wish I had a picture of this (I don’t dare whip out the camera around these very serious Chinese immigration officials). I turned around and there is Ashley..well sort of. I saw the top of a blond head and a hand sticking up holding a US Passport. You could hardly see her over the counter. The immigration officer had to standup and lean over the counter to see that there was someone there. I was proud of the girls, they each went though on their own, managing their own documents.
We got on the train without too much fuss. It was a standard commuter train with 4 seats across, 2 on each side of the aisle. We settled in and at a few minutes after 9, we bid farewell to GuangZhuo and headed off towards Hong Kong. The trip was about an hour and forty minutes. It was an overcast day with drizzle. The country side was grey, and the scenery was mainly fields and small villages. The attendants on the train, I assume they were like conducts, were two lovely young ladies that were dressed in military type uniforms. They checked tickets and collected trash. A little lady in a frilly apron came by later, apparently asking if anybody wanted to order something to eat or drink. I didn’t even attempt it. I saw her come down the isle a little later with a tray of tea. If you didn’t know it, tea is really big here.
The girls pretty much played their DS’s and looked out the window. Linda read her book and Simon slept. I read my book, snoozed a little and watched the country side. Before we knew it, we were pulling into Hong Kong Station. Once again we did the customs thing (I know, your thinking why do you have to go through customs if you’re still in China. We all know that Hong Kong was handed over from British rule back to China in 1997. Well, this is part of the deal in how China took Hong Kong back. They basically left it the same, with the same security measures, economic system, money, etc. Perhaps you have heard the slogan “One Country Two Systems”. It means we can be a communist country and a capitalistic one and make big bucks. In China, you can’t just decide to live in another city or take a job in another city or leave the country…you must have the government’s permission to do all that.. There are lots of mainland Chinese who want to go to Hong Kong and enjoy the freedom and economic advantage they might find there. This is one of the reason for the customs at Hong Kong still existing between the mainland. It is a way for China to continue to control the inflow of people from mainland China. For example, Simon was only allowed to enter Hong Kong for 7 days (we were allowed in for 90)).
We headed out to the sidewalk and waited for our driver. Up pulled what looked like a cargo van. Linda guessed this was an old FedEx delivery vehicle with old park benches bolted inside. I think she might be right. We got very spoiled. All of the drivers we had up to this point kept their vehicles in impeccable shape. While this was clean it clearly had been rode hard and had several lives….but it got us to our destination; the Golden Mile Holiday Inn at Hong Kong.
We got checked in, and agreed to meet back up with Simon at 1PM to head out to Stanley Market. That gave us about an hour and half to clean up and grab something to eat…we were all getting hungry. We dumped our stuff and headed out to the street. Now, we have encountered lots of crowds in China. Unlike 13 years ago, we noticed they seem to actually form lines more often. Before they used to bunch up a lot.
Still, there is less concern over personal space. You just sort of plow through to get where you need to go. For example, when getting off a plane in the US, we usually empty the plane row by row, letting the people in the row ahead of you empty before you proceed up the aisle. Not necessarily true in China. You need to be somewhere …you go, whether that means through, around or over. I guess with 1.5 billion people it’s necessary. One thing about this “personal space” issue that did bother me was the folks on the street begging and the people hawking items (these people were EVERYWHERE). They have no problem touching you. I had one lady come up and actually start slapping me in the arm! It was effective. She got my attention. I don’t what she wanted, she was trying to sell me something. At first you try to be polite and say “no thank you” (which is something like “Bu Xei Xei” in mandarin). Then when they starting poking you and slapping you, you want to land a right hook to their melon. Now if this lady was trying to tell me my pants were on fire, I could understand her behavior. But she was trying to sell me a map of the city or some ridiculous trinket. The panhandlers come up and touch the girls hair, and take their tin cups and poke you in the gut and in the arm and literally stand next to you so they are leaning on you. This was a little troublesome for me.
So we found a new twist when we got to the streets of Hong Kong…the ultra aggressive merchandise hawks. These guys, many of them eastern Indians, play some sort of zone coverage on the side walk. You can’t walk 10 feet with someone approaching you..”hey boss, how bout a nice tailored suit. We make nice!” Or “how ‘bout designer copy handbags…you look good!” I had one guy standing in front of a jewelry store where he clearly worked try to sell me no line bifocals! I guess these guys can get you a good deal on anything.
But there is a part of this crowd survival instinct the Chinese have that I respect. It is sort of a “shove or be shoved” approach. I believe it is what has formed the basis of the driving rules of the road that we have been observing. I believe it must have its roots in a form of pedestrian chicken. I was walking along in Stanley market jammed up behind a bunch of people on a narrow street. All of a sudden I felt myself going sideways, off balance and stumbling to the left after receiving a squarely placed blow to my right side. As I turned, ready to give someone a piece of my mind, I realized I had just been hip-checked by a 4’ 6” Chinese woman who couldn’t have been a day under 85 years old. All I could do was start laughing, think about their driving technique and think to myself, “well played, lady.”
Before we met up with Simon at 1PM, our mission was to navigate these streets, cluttered with people and merchandise peddlers and grab something to it. It was at this point I learned something about my wife of 15 years that I never knew. She can spot a McDonalds at 300 yards with the naked eye. I don’t know if she actually saw it was just using the force like they did in Star Wars…but she got us there. We grabbed a quick burger and made it back to meet Simon. The plan was to use public transportation to go to the far side of Hong Kong Island and go to the Stanley Market. Stanley Market is like a fancy, permenant flea market situated on Repulse bay on Hong Kong. It used to be a place where you would go get phenomenal bargains… now, it was fun but not so cheap as we remembered.
Anyway, we got on the subway that went UNDER the harbor and took us to Hong Kong island. At this point, it was obvious Simon wasn’t too clear on how to find the right bus…but he asked a few locals and before you knew it, we were on a double decker bus winding up the hillsides on incredibly narrow roads on our way across the island. The view is breath-taking (and sometimes downright scary). On the way we pass an infamous building that has a hole in it. You can see it in the picture. It is a big appartment buidling with a square hole. The story, as I remember it, was that this building while being built fell on much misfortune (people were killed, etc.). It was so bad that the owner had a fung shua expert diagnose the problem. You see, they built the building in a position that blocked the dragon from coming down off the mountain and getting to the sea (water in front of your house and moutains behind is good fung shua unless you happen to be blocking a dragon who wants to pass by). So they literally modified the building and cut a hole in it to let the dragon pass. Now all is well.
We got to Stanley Market and split up with Simon. He wanted to head for high tea. We had had a quick burger McDonald’s but needed something more to tied us over. So, we stopped at a local café for some appetizers. There is a really big rugby tournament going on in Hong Kong right now. Everywhere you go you run into super-sized rugby players from all over Europe. It seemed right now they were all in the pubs along Repulse Bay.
We spent the next 2 hours walking around the shops and doing a little shopping. These places are funny…they all really have identical stuff. Little of it, if any is authentic and you can bargain on anything. I found that if you go in and ask the price a group of items, then ask for the price individually multiple times you will get multiple answers. These guys will drop their price by 50% with out even trying.. You can still buy the stuff cheap…but the mind reels to think of what little amount they are buying the stuff for. But, it is a lot of fun shopping and haggling.
At around 5pm we hopped back on a public bus and headed back towards the financial district. We got a little way up the road and got stopped in traffic. We could make no sense of the traffic control. We were at a toll booth and they had our lane complete stopped. Two lanes over, a police man would stop the traffic for about five minutes and then let them go through…he did this on and off at weird intervals for about 30 minutes. During that whole 30 minutes…we sat. Eventually we were allowed to go and we crawled back to downtown.
Once there, we walked over to the tram to go up to the top of Victoria’s peak. It was still overcast, but we were hopefully we might get a good view. The tram has been running since the late 1800’s and is one of the steepest trams in existence. We boarded up and took the 10 minute ride up the big hill. When we got there, we got off the tram righ in the gift shop. Turns out, the place at the peak is about 7 levels of gift shops. It is essentially a mini-mall. We took about 7 escalators up to the top observation deck. And when we got there, as our luck always has it, we were standing in a big cloud. You could hardly see your hand in front of your face. The cloud moved in and out with the wind, so we did get some glimpses of the city. It was an amazing facility…something to marvel at. We walked around a bit, took a break for some coffee in a coffee shop in the tower and gazed out the window at the skyline, or at least those parts of it that became visible as the wind blew. It was a cool ride and a nice facility…just too bad we didn’t have a clear evening.
We made our way down the hill and got on another city bus. It is probably worth mentioning that all this public transport was easy because 1) we had a guide who spoke the language, and while not knowing the way all the time, he could at least ask for directions 2) we each had an octopus card that could be used for any of these locations and transportation means (a reload-able transit card). The bus took us down to the ferry boat landing. We hopped the ferry across the harbor to Hong Kong. The views were spectacular. We pulled into the landing, stumbled off the boat and began walking to our hotel. Thank goodnes we had Simon…because there was no way I was finding my way back. But we got there, safe and sound and exhausted. So, we headed to the room to get rested up. We have an early morning tomorrow…we’re heading home.

Thursday in GuangZhou

It was wonderful getting a good nights sleep at the White Swan Hotel. This was one of China's first 5 star hotels. It was built 25 years ago. This hotel has become somewhat famous for hosting adoptive families. Everywhere you go you see new families. This morning I snapped a shot of the restaurant. Once again there were China babies everywhere.

Last night, Linda got a huge surprise. 2 Adoption Barbie dolls were delivered to our room. We had heard about these. It is a special edition issued by Mattel exclusively for folks who are adopting. Every family in the White Swan that is here on an adoption trip gets one (we got 2!). They did not have these when we were here adopting Maggie...when we heard about it, Linda tried everything to get one and couldn't. So this was a very nice surprise and what a great souvenir.

At dinner tonight we learned more interesting things about life in China talking with Simon. He showed us the difference between "apartments" and "dormitories." He described how the older generation enjoyed 2 benefits from the government - free health care, and very inexpensive living. At the time, 20 years ago, everyone worked for the government. You were provided housing (that was built in the 50s, 60s and 70s) for a very nominal amount. At the time, there were no privately owned buildings, and there were not high rises and "apartment" buildings. In 2000, the government announced that they are cancelling both of these benefits. Many older people were panicked and upset...they did not have the money to buy there own apartments. They were given the choice to buy their "dormitory" as it was referred to, or pay a much high rent. Since most of these people did not have anywhere near the savings to buy these properties at market value, the government paid people for their years of service working (remember, everyone worked for the government). In this way, many were able to buy their dormitories. After 2000, construction began like crazy by private individuals and companies to build apartment buildings, high rises and commercial properties (this explains the massive amount of building we have been seeing).

All of the land is owned by the government. No private person can own land. You can own the building and you lease the land from the government. The government ,however, can take your land and property any time they need it and not compensate you. You may sell your building and make money, but at some point, the land is no longer available to you - your lease is up (typically 70 years from what I understand). I spoke with one of the shop keepers today who was very upset with what recently happened on Shiamen Island (where our hotel is). The government decided they needed to renovate a series of buildings in order to preserve them. So, they told the people who lived in them and the shop owners they needed to get out. They were not provided alternative living, and not paid any compensation. So, she asked many questions about how this worked in the US. Simon said something interesting tonight. He said the man who built the White Swan (where we are staying) had a lot of foresight in building the hotel and made lots of money. Then he said that he no longer owns it he gave it to the government. I am confused as to how that works and why someone would do that. Something may have been lost in translation.

After breakfast this morning we explored the area around the hotel. It was a glorious morning. We did some shopping but did a lot of people watching. There are park areas all over where people go and do numerous activities. One activity that is fun to watch is many of the older people dance. It looked to me like they had a few instructors out there with them. They were having loads of fun. We saw some folks playing badminton. Lina had told us that in university, she was required to learn table tennis and badminton...two very popular games. We saw school kids coming out for exercises. They all exercised in unison to instructions and music...it was fun to watch. The schools here don't have big gymnasiums like we do. So, they need to do something to ensure they get physical activity.

We stopped and saw the medical clinic where we walked with Maggie from the White Swan Hotel for her to get her physical for the adoption.

We walked by the Catholic church. It wasn't opened but we walked around the outside. There were a few older Chinese ladies watching us closely. I think we made them nervous and one actually waved us off. We decided to move on. It was a pretty building...but appeared to be very old. We could not tell much about it, all the signs were in Chinese.

We also stoppd outside the US Consulate. This is the building where we had to go to get Maggie's Green Card. That morning, we came around the corner and all you could see was a sea of people. If you look at the photo of the white building with the offical US seal on the building, everywhere you could see in this picture would be covered with people. Melody, taking charge like she had throught the whole trip, forged ahead through the sea of people, said something to the guard and the next I knew, we were pushing through the crowds and entering the gates. We figured that the Chinese don't celebrate Columbus Day. The day before had been Columbus day, but the Chinese people didn't realize that. The consulate was closed. So all of these irratated people had been there yesterday and they weren't open...now all those people have returned fit to be tied. It was an interesting memory of a bizzare event.

We met up with Simon at 1PM and headed for the subway. He wanted to take us over to one of the large malls and do some shopping and people watching. We got on the subway. The whole underground station was amazing. It is extremely clean. It has big flat panel monitors and TVs playing all manner of programs and advertisements. You buy your ticket much like you do at the EL Stations in Chicago for CTA from a machine that gives you tokens. They are cool...there must be a little chip in them. They look like coins, but you wave them past a sensor...much like a Mobil Gas Station Speedpass. The trains were clean, and man did they move fast. We got off a few stations out and walked to one of the Beijing 2008 Olympic stores. China has all kinds of memorabilia that has been produced for the 2008 games. They sell them in stores across the country that are specially designated stores to sell this merchandise. All of the prices are set...so you are guaranteed to be getting a consistent price and quality no matter from which store you purchase your merchandise.

From there, we got back on the subway and went a few more stops to go to a local mall. There malls are very different. Rather than a number of large chain type stores, they have little shops. There are almost like a series of sole proprietors. Or another way of thinking about it, is a very, very upscale flea market where each vendor has their own stall. It was very crowded and packed with all kinds of merchandise. The mall did also have a large department and grocery store in it as well. We walked around and window shopped and worked our way back to the hotel via the subway. You'll notice from the pictures how crowded the streets are. You can also notice they LOVE KFC. There are more KFC stores in China than any other franchise I have seen...KFC is the Starbucks of China, they are almost on every corner.

We got back to the hotel and sat outside at the little deli enjoying a Coke Light (they don't have "diet" soda). It was a very pleasant, almost tropical evening. We went back to the room and rested up as we were headed out for a dinner cruise on the Pearl River. The Pearl River runs through the center of GuanZhou and empties out into the China sea at Hong Kong.

The dinner was a Chinese buffet and it was delicious. The skyline was beautiful as we cruised up and down the river. We got a few shots of the White Swan hotel from the water. It is the building outlined in pure white lights. It was a very pleasant evening with a cool breeze. It was nice to have a relaxing evening to sit and chat. After the cruise we headed back to the hotel.

We stopped to take a few pictures around the hotel. It has been a long tradition to take a picture of all the babies in an adoption group on the "red couches" in the lobby of the White Swan. Linda and I each took our picture with Maggie on the traditional red couch. We have the picture of her with her 11 Xiamen sisters in 1995 in our scrap book. It was interesting talking to some of the shop keepers today. One was amazed when we pointed out that Maggie was Chinese. He didn't think she looked Chinese at all. He actually said he thought the more she lived with us the more she began to look like us. He honestly didn't thin she looked Chinese. Another shop keeper was incredulous over my statement that Maggie was 4 months old when we adopted her. She said that's "impossible." "These children are at least 8 months old before they are adopted." That's because they changed the policy. China will not release any child before the age of 6 months so they can observe them and ensure they are "healthy." By the time an assignment is made and a family travels, the child is typically at least 1 year old. I explained, when we adopted Maggie, the program was brand new and we were in a very early group. The rules were not the same back then. It was interesting speaking with them and getting their perspective. They were all very gracious and genuinely curious.

Well, we need to be packed and in the hotel lobby by 7:15AM. We are taking the shuttle to the train station to take a bullet train to Hong Kong. We should leave at 9AM and to Hong Kong in about an hour. From there, we have a day of sight seeing before heading home on Saturday.